I was looking through my blogs and I didn’t see the transcript of my second interview with a queer mujer, who also happens to be a close friend. Well luckily I spotted that mistake- here is my interview with her, dive into her life and take a second to look through her eyes.
DA- Do your parents know you are queer/gay?
Respondent- No- I’m scared [to tell them]. I’m scared because my family is the number one thing in my life you know, my family and my best friend. It was so hard just even to tell her( best friend) and my family is like, I feel like it’s even harder because they…like I’m always trying to protect them. Whatever I do…everything I do is for my family, all these sacrifices that I have done it’s for them, you know? And I don’t want to be the one to hurt them.
DA-And you think that this will hurt them?
Respondent-Now…no. Back then I did. It’s kind of hard to explain. Like I’m getting to the point where I need to tell them. I need to be a little selfish and like I talked to [a friend] several times and she told me, “You need to be a little selfish. You need to think about yourself sometimes too.” And I think I’m just waiting for the right moment. I think I’m waiting to graduate from college to tell them.
DA- Sounds difficult.
Respondent– Yeah, there’s a lot going on in my life right now that I feel like if I do this right now, it’s just going to create more stress for me. I’m just waiting to get my school out of my way and for me to just be able to sit down with them.
DA- So, where do you go to meet other queer people? Is there any particular place here in Orange County where queer women hang out?
Parties. Gay parties.
DA-That’s where you meet them?
Yeah, well that’s where I meet them. I met a lot of people through just… I mean if you meet one gay person you meet other gay people and so you just meet them through them. It’s like a small underground..thing going on. It’s not really seen, public. You have to know people who know people. Know where the parties are at that are strictly for gay people. And they’re exclusive, because I have friends who don’t necessarily like to party with straight people because they feel like they are being hit on by guys or something. They would rather stick with partying with their own…kind. (Laughs) I have friends who do the whole online dating thing, which I could never do because I think you have to meet the person first and then build a relationship from it. I don’t think I could ever do the online thing…it’s pretty much the whole networking thing, meeting one gay person then getting introduced to other people…
DA- How has your experience as a gay woman shaped who you are today? And this doesn’t have to just be with your queer identity, just you as a person?
Participant- It kind of has allowed me to walk with my head held high. You know I’m more confident with the person that I am. I’m able to stand up for what I believe in instead of hide it all the time. I definitely have matured a lot, especially relationship wise…
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